Archive for hope

Hide and Speak?

Posted in Uncategorized with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on March 31, 2010 by Haylei

So, I apologize for not writing in a while. It’s been a bit of a whirlwind the past few months. But! The Lord is faithful, good, and took care of me just in time!

I have something that has been laid on my heart, and once again, it’s going to step on a couple of toes.

Relationships.
Yes, I said the word. Relationships are hard..and it’s something that you have to work at daily..but recently, I’ve had a bit of a change of view on the outlook I hold on them. I’ve been in this spot a couple of times, but just moments before I began to write this, it just kinda hit me in the face and I was like…”dang..that kinda sucks worse when you think about it like that.”
I’ve been put in this position, where I’m missed..but the guy that’s telling me that, is taken. I know, shame on him right? No. He’s entitled to his own feelings..and it’s good he’s being honest with it. I’m not one to judge or anything, and you shouldn’t either. He’s entitled to have feelings, but like I said, I’m glad that he’s honest about it and not hiding
Today I told him basically that if you can’t hang out with me in broad daylight without your girlfriend getting upset, why would hanging out “secretively” be any different?
For those of you out there thinking, “Well haylei, what she don’t know won’t hurt her.”

Wrong.

I mean isn’t that kinda what we do to our Father? Daddy God (as I call Him)? I mean..we are sooo deathly scared of hangin out with him in public, yet we are okay with it when the door is shut and certain people aren’t around.
Why should you be ashamed of Him outside of the door and not in? If you’re going to praise Him, praise Him at ALL times. Same goes for the opposite, if you’re going to shun and ignore Him outside and around your “friends” and in  broad daylight..then you should do the same thing inside too.
We’ve all heard the saying, “you can’t have your cake and eat it too.” My saying? “You can’t have your cake AND ice cream.” Yes, they are good together, but you can’t have the best of both worlds. Period. You can’t straddle the fence or cross the line when things get tough..you have to, at some point, make a decision and pick a side.

You’ve gotta let this sink in.
Why be in a pointless relationship, right? That goes the same for Daddy God. Why would you be in an earthly relationship that you can’t talk to your significant other about your other relationship with Jesus, huh? Dude, come on now. Get real. You know that’s just dumb. Quit ignoring Him and puttin’ Him in a box! You can’t just take Him out and tell Him what you need and then put Him back in…it’s called COMMUNICATION! Meaning, you have to listen not just as much, but TWICE as much as you talk. And trust me, that is a struuuggglle for me. 😛 I love to talk..I can talk to God for hours and then just fall asleep on Him, and yes, He’s always going to love me, but He’s a jealous God. He doesn’t just want part of us or little bits and pieces of us…He wants us all. He is so madly in love with us that He gave His son for us. Some of you out there, know what it’s like to lose your only child..I can only imagine. But imagine trying to WILLINGLY give  your son or daughter up…so that others may live. So that OTHER parents can have their sons and daughters.
Could you do that?
I don’t know if I could or not honestly. That would be hard. And you gotta think of what Jesus’ mother experienced. WATCHING her Son die. Being beaten, battered and bruised…hung on a cross…just struggling to breathe. Watching Him take His last breath..again I ask, could you do that?

Last week at Oneless, the Lord spoke and said the following:
“How desperate, is desperate? How lost, is lost?
How desperate do you have to be to call for help? How completely and utterly lost do you have to be to finally ask for directions?
All you have to do is call My Name, and I will be there. No matter how faint the whisper, or loud the yell, I will swoop you up in My arms and save you. ”

Psalm 138:3
“The moment I called out, You stepped in; You made my life large with strength.”

I don’t think I need a question or a profound statement to end..I think it all speaks for itself.
Just let it…
Sink.
In.

-h

Mirror Mirror On the Wall

Posted in Poetry - God, Visions:) with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on February 12, 2010 by Haylei

The tape you place upon my mouth, symbols the voice in which i have, but do not use.
I have the freedom of my hands to take it off, yet i don’t and let be what happens, instead of changing it to what i know in my heart it should be.
I hear the cry of the others voices and yet you silence mine.

You whisper in my ear, that the image that i see before me, is demented and appauling..
but deep down i know one day, they’ll all be applauding.
these thoughts you whisper, feels like you’re yelling them aloud..
that everyone can hear..this distinctive sound.
don’t tell me i’m wrong when i know i’m right..
not unless you’re willing for this fight.
my mouth might be taped, my voice might be silenced..
but my hands are free, and you won’t like it.
toss and turn as i hear the punches..
listen to the sound as each bone crunches.
i hear a loud shatter and straight up i sit,
my eyes now wide open and my lip, bit.
this fight i saw you’d think were between two..
when really it was just you..and you.
this thing called a mirror shows your reflection..
it racks up so much of your attention.
make yourself pretty, presentable and fake..
with no one knowing, its your life you want to take.
this mirror defines us, instead of the tables being turned,
and not one thing they’ve taught us have we learned.
the magazines tell us what we should be,
places the tape across our mouths only left to see
the monster we’ve become and allowed it to happen..
because it’s our stomachs that we all want flattened.
no matter if your a girl looking for that guy..
no matter if you’re that boy tryin to look fly.
the fact of the matter still stands,
what will you continue to do with your hands?

I’ve been having this dream about mirrors..and I feel it’s time to step on up and begin talking about it.

Knives are for cooking, baking, and kitchen work…not for your arms, legs or back.
Bathrooms are for hygine and “primping”…not to throw up your meals, and nutrition.
Mirrors are to make sure that nothing is in your teeth…not to define who you are.

Your body, is YOURS. Not someone elses to tell you what to do with, how to perfect it, or how to make it better…or for that matter…how to make more doggone appealing.
The way I see it, the one that will love you forever, will realize that there’s more to you than your appearance. They’ll care about your personality and your character, not your jean size or the number on the scale. Think about it, is your appearance really going to matter when you’re old, with wrinkles and that gray hair? NO! You stay with someone because you love being around them..not their looks.

Your thoughts, are YOURS. Not for someone else to try and tear down. It’s what makes us unique and sets us apart from all the rest. You must have the will power to overcome the negative and fine that positive, no matter how gosh darn small it is. If you find that positive in the negative, you will begin to see a change in your attitude towards your circumstances, and just life in general. I don’t care how much of a relief it is the see the blood on the knife, or to feel it pierce your skin…the fact of the matter is, a certain Someone pierced Their skin a long time ago…He actually got beaten and nailed to a cross for YOU. YOU. Hello? that means you don’t have to shed any more blood, or bare the scars of a heartache you once had. It means He has taken them away and you are free to lift up Holy hands and give thanks for the life He has given you, and for the destiny He is taking you towrds.

Your life, is NOT YOURS.
re-read that if it didn’t hit you hard enough.
YOUR LIFE ISN’T YOURS. The breaths you take are graciously given to you for a purpose greater than you could ever see, dream, or comprehend. You are MADE to stand out from the crowd, not to conform to society, and you have been set in the place you are in, in the state and town you are in for a REASON. HE gave you life, so that you may carry out the a greater Life..the one the a Man named Jesus gave in order for you to have one.

You are His daughter, His princess. The apple of His eye. He has for you a palace of your very own waiting for you in the greatest kingdom and neighborhood that any one woman could ever fathom live in. You have been hand made into a beautiful creation beyond belief. The mirror may whisper in your ear a mouthful of lies dripping with disaster, but you have the power to take off the tape and define who YOU are..who HE has created you to be. He wants you to see through His eyes how amazingly beautiful you are. He doesn’t care about how tiny your body is, or if you have long or short hair…and in return, the man of your dreams will have the same outlook as well.

You are His son, His prince. The champ beyond all He has known. He has for you a palace of your very own waiting for you in the greatest kingdom and neighborhood that any one man could ever fathom to live in. You have been hand mand into a handsome creation beyond beilief. The mirror may whisper in your ear a mouthful of lies dripping with disatster, but you have the power to take off the tape and define who YOU are..who HE has created you to be. He wants you to see through His eyes, how amazingly handsome you are. He doesn’t care about how muscular you body is, or if you have a six pack…and in return, the woman of your dreams will have the same outlook as well.

Sons and daughters alike, the knife may feel like a sense of relief to you in your time of need and trouble, but the grace of God and healing power of your Heavenly Father is a breath of fresh air. His arms are the sense of relief that you long for…for the love you lack in your personal and parental life.

Sons and daughters alike, the purging may feel like a hell hole that cannot be climbed out of, but the Love of Jesus can pull you out. His hand can pick you up and turn you around in the right direction. The question is, will you stay there or turn around and go back to your comfort hole…clinging on to that bowl that brings you nothing but straight agony..?

Who will you be defined as?
sons and daughters of man…
or Sons and Daughters of the Most High?

If you know of someone that’s hurting themselves, feel free to DM tweet me @CraziKiddLoMo
And you can find me on Facebook and Myspace – Haylei Cummings
If you want my e-mail, comment this post.
You ARE loved.
Remember, Live Love and Love Life.

-h

There’s Always A First:)

Posted in Smiles for Miles, Uncategorized with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on December 3, 2009 by Haylei

So last Tuesday marked another first for Smiles for Miles!

I gave 12 bags of stuffed animals away that were going to Navajo Indian Reservations in New Mexico and Arizona, for Christmas. To my understanding, Johnny left with the 18 wheelers yesterday.

I must say, the feeling was absolutely overwhelming. No, it wasn’t over seas, but Smiles for Miles was created to give children hope for not just their future, but tomorrow…what better way than to recieve a soft little cuddle buddy on Christmas?

Short update, but the feeling I just can’t put into words.
I wanted to take a moment to thank, Tyler Hall. He helped me count over 1,000 stuffed animals earlier last week, and then got me hooked up with Johnny:) So thank you, dear. You just helped a part of my dream come so much more than just reality…it was a gift that was absolutely amazing. You have one huge heart and are destined to do great things for His Glory. I assure you that:)

To all the others that have been helping, Joan out at Salvation Army…I wouldn’t have been able to give that many stuffed animals away if it wasn’t for you. I love you.

To Mrs.Barb, and Mister Brown…You guys keep me sane! haha! With all those animals, I definitely needed a place for them all, and you guys are so graciously taking care of me. I love you guys.

First send off for Smiles for Miles

One step closer to the things to come for Smiles for Miles.

Remember, live love and love life.
You could be a child’s hope and life saver, just by giving a stuffed animal.

.:haylei:.

The main element here, is Green.

Posted in Uncategorized with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on October 8, 2009 by Haylei

Your purpose was not to be what this world wants you to be but what His eyes saw and His hands molded you to be. You were put on this world for a purpose greater than any on mans eyes could see. Your heart may be broken as you say goodbye, but there is a tomorrow that has your name written upon it. You are defined not by the struggles you face, but how well you carry yourself throughout them. You may be losing family, but they are not gone forever, they are merely going on to the destiny God has placed in their life. They were in your life for a season and a reason and to make you stronger. To bring you a set of guidelines and to get you started. It’s not about the quality of the boat that has been given to you, it’s what you do with it is how you will be remembered. Your boat right now are the guidelines that this family has brought into our lives and the lessons that we have learned in the 13 years we have shadowed under them. Your destiny is not about the people who have been brought into your life, but what you do with them.

You have only one life, so what will you do with it?
Your impossible situation, is God’s way of getting you to HIS destination.

Along with those words, I leave you with a poem.

Your heart may be broken,
But His love is the greatest token.
Your burden may be too heavy,
But by His steps we remain steady.
One man made a difference in you,
Now take his teachings and keep them through
your biggest trials, think and thin,
Because with that and Him,
You’ll surely win.
Your heart remains in His hands,
Just remember there’s only one set of prints in the sand.
Be strong dear daughter for you are mine,
I’ve given you a light so let it shine.
Be strong my dear son,
For your life has only just begun.

This goes out to my newly found family at Westmore..and mainly to my peeps at The Element. If you are reading this…know that this only makes you stronger. I was in your very shoes just a year and 8 months ago. I know what you’re feeling. And I will be honest with you..it hurts..and is going to hurt for a little while. But it DOES get better. You are made stronger through it. Your head may be held low, but He will come pick you up by the chin and tell you, “Dear child of mine, I love you. I will never leave you.” And that my dear friends, is the greatest thing to hear from your heavenly Father and friend at that time. My heart breaks for those of you that looked to the Green family, as YOUR family…and more importantly..to Robert as a father figure, or another parent. Know this, HE LOVES YOU TOO! If he didn’t, he wouldn’t have prayed over EACH and EVERY one of you! That says a lot right there!
You WILL make it through this..in time..in HIS time..until then, you’ve got me, and I know a leadership team as well as friends behind you, that will back you up, build you up, and help you up:)

Secondly, for those other bloggers out there reading this..I was just going to post this as a note on my facebook..just for my Westmore gang..and I just couldn’t do it. Someone out there reading this…this was for YOU! You were MEANT to read this…whether you know me, or not. I’m not exactly sure who it was for..but I know that it is going to speak volumes in your life. You have to have faith as it talks about all throughout Hebrews. Faith isn’t always easy. Hebrews 11 states that is believing in something that isn’t there at that moment. No, you may not have after job tomorrow, but you have a God and a Heavenly Father that loves you and that’s going to see you through, and send you where you’re needed…wanted. No, your son or daughter may not be home tomorrow, but there is an angel protecting them from harm and danger till they’re safe in YOUR arms. No, he or she may not stop hitting you tomorrow…but one day very soon you will be free. Don’t take that lightly! Whoever that was that I just spoke to with that last sentence, DO NOT TAKE THAT LIGHTLY! “yeah, right. like i haven’t heard that before. whatever.” umm…no. He promised you that you would do great things..and that you will. “I AM, THAT, I AM.”

HE IS, YOUR PROTECTOR/HEALER/PROVIDER, HE IS.

No drug can make you feel like He can. No amount of alcohol can give you the buzz that He can only create. That knife will NEVER be able to cut deep enough to release the pain you feel. The mirror will never tell you you’re good enough.  Those pills, only last for a few hours.
BUT…
MY God, lasts for an eternity. Whether you want to believe it or not. And I’ll say it again, it doesn’t matter what denomination you are from. It doesn’t matter who you are, where you came from, or what your background is. We are all given a boat, and are supposed to use it…regardless of the holes, ducktape, tears in the sale or the size for that matter! We are to use it to the best of our ability. You make it what you want..better yet..you make it what He instructs you to make it. So what if you don’t have the materials now, He always provides somehow.

HE IS, YOUR PROTECTOR/HEALER/PROVIDER, HE IS.

Be ready for the storm of His Love that is about to flood your life.
Remember, Live Love and Love Life.

-h

Baby steps and growing up.

Posted in Smiles for Miles, Visions:) with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on September 1, 2009 by Haylei

Much to inform all you reading about Smiles for Miles out there!
First off, special thanks to Joan out at Salvation Army who donated over 200 stuffed animals last week! Not to mention the hundred that I found through out the house! And I know I have another box somewhere…just gotta find it! Haha! That’s a task and a mission in itself right there. 😛

Alright, the even bigger news. Today, I got the papers I needed to legalize everything, and I must say…I’m overwhelmed with excitement. Everything just fell right into place. Mister George is one awesome man, and I have the honor of working with him. The thing that got me most, is that he prayed with me before I left. That spoke volumes to me, more than anything. It was just one more confirmation that this is where God’s leading me, and I couldn’t be happier.
As I was talking to Jeff earlier today, this is a big step. I felt like…well, a grown up. I mean, I’m almost 20 years old, you’d think I’d feel that by now, right? Well I felt it today. My mom might as well be my best friend…I mean, she’s the one I bounce off ideas with, express my feelings to..both good and bad. She’s just…there. Always has been…and I was taking this step, without her by my side. It was a little scary to be honest. No, I don’t need “mommy holding my hand”, but it’s nice to have that safety net, you know?
I felt like I finally broke through this wall. I’m so over joyed, I’ve been crying tears of HAPPINESS! 😀 Finally..some happy tears! ^_^

Also, thanks to Pastor James, I feel like I have another safety net, Mt.Olive. I feel like I’m no longer in this by myself, and that I have some stable support behind me. It’s still so very nerve racking though! I mean, I’m still young, and making some BIG steps here! I just know, that my God is ordering them by His will, and any where I go…He’s leading me and I’m not kicking any doors open:) That’s all I the comfort I need.

Thanks to all of those who prayed for favor today! I love you all so dearly. Keep it up! And keep spreading the word! Remember, live love, and love life. Hope is just around the corner for these kids!

-h

God Provided:) S4M

Posted in Smiles for Miles, Uncategorized with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on August 20, 2009 by Haylei

So, here is the new update, for those of you bloggers reading out there:)

As of last night, I counted over 220 stuffed animals. My living room, was completely filled thanks to Amanda Trevena, my Uncle Donnie with Fire Station 1, Ruthie Forgey with The Salvation Army, Phil Brown and Mario Hood. And that was only last night. I still have MINE to count!

So…with counting all of those last night…I thought to myself, “I really need a storage unit. I can’t wait to legalize this for the tax forms..I need one ASAP. Lord…I need your help please!” And that’s exactly what He did.

I went into the storage place that my mom, as well as my office uses for storage, and talk to Ms. Barb:) Probably one of the sweetest ladies to ever be on this earth, and just happens to be in little ol’ Cleveland. I talked to her, told her about Smiles for Miles, and that I needed a storage unit, about a 5×10 if possible. She said that she had some openings, and it would be $55 monthly. I said, “That’s perfect. When can I have it?” She said, “We usually give the first month free, but ask you to pay the second month in advance, so we aren’t jipped.” Which is understandable. I asked if I could pay on Thursday (today), since I get paid on Thursdays, and she said, not a problem. We then got off topic somehow, and got into a long conversation. I was there an hour and didn’t even know it! After we had talked, I went over what I wrote down, so I made sure I didn’t forget anything. She then said, “You know what, I’m going to give you the rest of this month, as well as next month free. And you know..I’m not going to make you pay the $55 until October 1st. Don’t worry about it until then.” I about dropped to the floor. I thanked her, took my key, and left. Called my mom, joy and excitement overflowing..and then went home.

Now, if you don’t believe that was God, I have more.
I received a call today, at 12:44 pm. I was eating lunch with my family, hearing all the stories about when my mom and aunt were younger, and hearing about Brian and that darn cat BJ. It was hilarious. I was in the middle of laughing when I answered. It was Ms. Barb, and she said she had some news to tell me. She said, “I talked to Mr. Brown yesterday evening, and told him what you are starting up, and what you’re using the storage for. He told me to call and tell you, that we aren’t going to charge you until December.” I said, “You mean, I have until December first free!?” She said, “Well, he’s just going to let you have that. And if we need to use it, we will call and notify you, and put you in another one, big or small. Small being temporary until we can get you a bigger one. But yes, it’s free.” I told her what a blessing this was, and that I prayed that they would be greatly blessed and highly favored for what they had just given me! I then proceeded over to Ms. Barb’s building, walked in and gave you one BIG hug! She then asked me if I had gotten a lock yet, and I told her no, I was waiting till I received my paycheck today. She then finds an extra lock, and just gives it to me.

So lets see. 220 animals in one day.
A free 5×10 storage unit.
Then to top it all off, a free lock.
If you don’t believe that was God, you’re blind.

God provided TREMENDOUSLY!
So thanks to all of you who have been praying for this ministry and for me! You are so appreciated! I look forward to telling you all more!

Remember, live love…and love life.

-h

The Latest.

Posted in Smiles for Miles, Uncategorized with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on August 13, 2009 by Haylei

Alright, so..it’s been a pretty crazy week to say the least. Smiles for Miles kinda laid low on the radar of my life, as finding a new place with my sister and mom, took precedence  over everything. Not to mention the moving in, which was killer. But, thankfully, we are basically all moved in and loving our new place. The next thing that took over, almost everything for the time being, was the passing of one of my dear friends, Spencer Kile Alford. Don’t ask me questions, just go here. But there’s life in death, and I’m rejoicing in the Lord, because I know he is in a better place. I love and miss him dearly, as does his other friends and family, but knowing that the joy, strength and peace of the Lord comes when I call His name, gets my through. For He is the I am, as King has reminded me, quite a bit.

SO! This brings me to my update for Smiles for Miles.
I have to get Smiles for Miles legalized as a non-profit organization, before I can get any tax write off forms, or basically anything else to do with that. From what I’m told, it’s going to take any where from 2 to possibly 4 or 5 months. So, for those of you reading, be praying that I am able to find an attorney that’s not only quick at what he/she does, but that it won’t cost me an arm and a leg..maybe even some toes. haha! Thank you in advance, for all of your prayers.

Also, I am getting stuffed animals like CRAZY! It’s AWESOME! I have bags, soon to be BARRELS full! Literally!! Miss Ruthie is going to be giving me BARRELS! How awesome is that?? But DO NOT LET IT STOP THERE! I can ALWAYS use more! I will find somewhere bigger to store them, as soon as possible. As of right now, they’re at my house, in my closet. haha:)

Last but not least, Charity Graff in Philippines as well as Paul Stockard in Paraguay have both contacted me this morning. Charity is over Gentle Hands, which I believe is a deaf orphanage. Paul is over Children of the Dump…and I think that name says everything needed. So what this now means, is that I have 2 more locations to send smiles and hope to. But, the catch is, they can’t come in the states and get them, they have to be shipped out, which is going to cost, quite a bit. But once again, I know God is going to supply the means in which this can be possible. Not sure how, but I remember seeing it, and I’m trusting and having faith, that He’s taking care of it:)

Thank you to all of you who are supporting me in this, and backing me up! Also, thank you to all who are donating animals, as well as anything else! You will be abundantly blessed! Remember, we aren’t just sending smiles, we are sending hope. If not for their future, just for tomorrow.

-h
Live.Love.Life.